When I was three or four, my mother and I scoured Escolta looking for a puppy that was being sold by a street vendor. It caught my eye as we were crossing the bridge that led to the Santa Cruz Church. To my father's consternation, I insisted on searching for the dog in that old but what was then a fashionable district, which at the end of it all might well turn out to be a lowly mongrel. Not that I never took care of mongrels later on in my childhood. But Escolta's profound graphic representation of my more genteel youth bodes well with the district's cobble stones, turn-of-the-century lamps and better dressed Filipinos. While Camilo my father was working in his office in one of those buildings, Pacita my mother and I would try to find the best outfit for this unico hijo in a store called Soriente Santos. I'm not sure if I was really supposed to look mature at three or four, but Pacita bought me suits that I wore even in not so important occasions. I never felt awkward about my magkaternong suit because for some reason, Pacita my mother always said that that's how a young gentleman should look like.
And a gentleman I think I was for the better part of my toddler years. I remember my aunt, Tia Aurea was so amazed at how I would never address adults directly but whisper to my mother whatever it was that concerned me. Or maybe it was a sign of extreme shyness. I didn't play just with anyone unless i was sure that they were nice kids. My father Camilo made sure that I played with the right children lest I get hurt in games that involved too much physical stress. in that sense, being the only boy who had Cadiz as a last name became both a blessing and a curse to my childhood.
This over-protectiveness of my father extended into my teen years. I was banned from biking in certain roads because they were deemed too busy with fast-moving cars. And just to make sure that I didn't hurt myself climbing trees or chasing after my hundred or so racing pigeons, I always had a boy who was at least my age or younger who did those chores for me. Among other things. These sidekicks flew kites for me, chased monitor lizards at the creek behind our house as well as kept an eye on potential kidnappers. When I was about 10, some shenanigans sent my family a letter threatening to kidnap me unless Camilo my father gave in to their requests. Many requests. Requests which of course were never granted either because they just simply overestimated my potential worth as a kidnap victim or they were plain ridiculous.
I don't know. But I was never told nor was I convinced even in my childhood that we were wealthy. We didn't have any business as a family or as a clan. In fact I had the distinct impression that my ancestors including the more immediate ones weren't really very hardworking people. For generations, the family lived off the harvests from our lands. And it was probably these lands that failed to convince people that we weren't really the cash-flowing clan that they think we were. In fact, sometime in the 80s and early 90s when copra was so dirt cheap, we had our share of bad economic times. Our family home, while relatively large by turn of the century standards, hasn't seen major renovation since the american occupation. And while I went away to attend a nice high school in Manila, I still felt I didn't get everything I wanted as a teenager.
It's probably the over-pondering about childhood and teen years that is so characteristic of mid-life. As we begrudgingly drag our feet into the 40s, some coped better than the others. They connected their nice memories of childhood and how they have shaped their personalities in their twenties and early thirties. and it kinda makes sense. My pampered childhood gave me a sense of protection and deep love but likewise exposed the fragility of a child whose killer instinct might have been be in jeopardy. the hunt for that little mongrel in sta cruz might be telling of my future sense on what animal's value can be discernible as it sits in its owner's basket as it lays waiting for the next available customer.
When my mother saw to it that i got nice suits, she knew that sometime in the future, it would be my turn to see that her needs are attended to. this sudden reversal still escapes me because although i might be turning 40 next year, i really was just 27 two weeks ago. My father's earlier than expected passing also put me through a responsibility i've been told from the beginning was mine but i ignored nonetheless. Now i'm the head of my family and along comes with it are the consequent benefits and heavy responsibilities.
soriente santos is no longer in escolta to help me look the part of the distinguished head of the family. that's good... that's good because i think that's the easiest part of it.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Gibo's Lost Cause
Gilbert Teodoro has all the makings of a successful politician. He was born into the right clan. He is Danding Cojuangco and Cory Aquino's nephew, the leaders of the two most important power blocs in the country in the past 25 years. He got an impeccable educational pedigree from Xavier to La Salle to UP then to Harvard with topping the Philippine Bar as his crowning achievement. Indeed, there's never been any doubt about this guy's intellectual capacity to lead.
Except that he has one fatal flaw. He is running for president under a party that has been condemned to the Dark Side since 2004. While the wicked ways of Philippine traditional politics would allow Lakas-Kampi's rank and file candidates from congressmen to town councilors to still dominate the elections come counting time, any association with its titular head, Gloria Arroyo is just too toxic for any presidential contender. In fact, Arroyo and Teodoro have never campaigned together nor have they appeared publicly in the same location since the campaign started. Some would say this is a stinging repudiation of Arroyo by Teodoro. Some say it is a smart strategy that utilizes Lakas' extensive machinery while staying away from Arroyo's kiss of death. What is clear is that both are keenly aware of one's effect on the other and they know it is not going to serve either one of them well. No one is saying, however, that Teodoro is being ungrateful for not acknowledging the president enough. In every forum for presidential candidates, Teodoro's most testy and at times trying moments are those where questions on his association with Arroyo are raised. Not only is it the 800 pound gorilla in the room, it might well be the tragedy of Gibo Teodoro.
And this is the heart of Teodoro's troubles. He can distance himself all he want from Arroyo's negative energy, but he still carries the banner of the party that is blamed for wanton corruption, electoral fraud of colossal proportions and human rights violations that could well compete with those attributed to Marcos. And the people rightfully hold him accountable for the Arroyo government's quality of governance. Not only is Arroyo not on the ballot for president, Teodoro had become the face of this monolithic and deeply-entrenched party. And while his supporters are quick to point out his sterling qualities as a leader and intellectual, the people's perception of him as Arroyo's candidate is just too strong to go away that easily. Besides, in more mature democracies, that is fair game. When a government screws up, the people are quick to remove the party that they so overwhelmingly elected in the previous elections. Although that can't be said of Arroyo. To say that she was even elected in 2004 becomes laughable in light of the hello garci tapes.
Teodoro's poor performance in the surveys is now a source of another fantastic spin by the Lakas camp. Now he is a victim. He is a victim because he is being judged as Arroyo's candidate and not the brilliant candidate that he is. He is a victim because he is being blamed for all the sins of the administration when he is running on his own. He is a victim because it's not his fault that Arroyo is seen by many as the reincarnation of the Fallen Angel. He is the victim because his powerful uncle Danding thinks he is one ungrateful protegee and that his counter spin is that he is not running for his uncle nor for his family but for the good of the country. Which is all so sweet except that it is such a bullshit.
Running so far behind in the race doesn't make Teodoro a victim, that makes him a potential loser. And running so far behind despite one's status as the ruling party's candidate with all its built-in advantages is not being a victim, it's called running a lousy campaign. Being judged as Arroyo's candidate is indeed playing the role of a victim. A willing victim. Let no one ever forget too that this man actively sought, competed for and obtained the nomination of Lakas and Arroyo's personal endorsement. He abandoned his uncle's much leaner Nationalist People's Coalition to take advantage of the muscles and stealth of Arroyo's Lakas-Kampi. Now he is stuck with it. In fact, he might have to preside over this party's total disintegration after the elections when the same wicked ways of Philippine politics would make Lakas just another minor political party when its members abandon it to join the new ruling party. Like they did from Marcos' KBL to Cory's PDP-LABAN-UNIDO to Ramos' Lakas-NUCD to Erap's NPC-PMP then back to another incarnation of Lakas-Kampi by Arroyo.
And to say that Teodoro should not be blamed for Arroyo's many sins just does not make political sense. That's what elections are supposed to do. It's supposed to bring back to the people the power to hold those who governed them accountable for how their leaders failed them. Teodoro not only shares the same party with Arroyo, he likewise served Arroyo's government in the very strategic role as Defense Secretary. He did not just play deaf when the hello garci tapes were playing, nor played blind while his colleagues in the cabinet were stealing billions in the fertilizer scam, Teodoro willingly embraced Arroyo and her government.
Why and how some people would even ignore the Arroyo aspect of Teodoro's candidacy is just too much of a spin. There's no way around it. That despite Teodoro's supposed brilliance, he failed to discern the collective impact of 10 years of unbridled greed for power and money in his decision to join her government, much less run as her party's standard bearer.
Teodoro's candidacy in Arroyo's party is no accident. And consequently, neither is his impending catastrophic defeat.
Except that he has one fatal flaw. He is running for president under a party that has been condemned to the Dark Side since 2004. While the wicked ways of Philippine traditional politics would allow Lakas-Kampi's rank and file candidates from congressmen to town councilors to still dominate the elections come counting time, any association with its titular head, Gloria Arroyo is just too toxic for any presidential contender. In fact, Arroyo and Teodoro have never campaigned together nor have they appeared publicly in the same location since the campaign started. Some would say this is a stinging repudiation of Arroyo by Teodoro. Some say it is a smart strategy that utilizes Lakas' extensive machinery while staying away from Arroyo's kiss of death. What is clear is that both are keenly aware of one's effect on the other and they know it is not going to serve either one of them well. No one is saying, however, that Teodoro is being ungrateful for not acknowledging the president enough. In every forum for presidential candidates, Teodoro's most testy and at times trying moments are those where questions on his association with Arroyo are raised. Not only is it the 800 pound gorilla in the room, it might well be the tragedy of Gibo Teodoro.
And this is the heart of Teodoro's troubles. He can distance himself all he want from Arroyo's negative energy, but he still carries the banner of the party that is blamed for wanton corruption, electoral fraud of colossal proportions and human rights violations that could well compete with those attributed to Marcos. And the people rightfully hold him accountable for the Arroyo government's quality of governance. Not only is Arroyo not on the ballot for president, Teodoro had become the face of this monolithic and deeply-entrenched party. And while his supporters are quick to point out his sterling qualities as a leader and intellectual, the people's perception of him as Arroyo's candidate is just too strong to go away that easily. Besides, in more mature democracies, that is fair game. When a government screws up, the people are quick to remove the party that they so overwhelmingly elected in the previous elections. Although that can't be said of Arroyo. To say that she was even elected in 2004 becomes laughable in light of the hello garci tapes.
Teodoro's poor performance in the surveys is now a source of another fantastic spin by the Lakas camp. Now he is a victim. He is a victim because he is being judged as Arroyo's candidate and not the brilliant candidate that he is. He is a victim because he is being blamed for all the sins of the administration when he is running on his own. He is a victim because it's not his fault that Arroyo is seen by many as the reincarnation of the Fallen Angel. He is the victim because his powerful uncle Danding thinks he is one ungrateful protegee and that his counter spin is that he is not running for his uncle nor for his family but for the good of the country. Which is all so sweet except that it is such a bullshit.
Running so far behind in the race doesn't make Teodoro a victim, that makes him a potential loser. And running so far behind despite one's status as the ruling party's candidate with all its built-in advantages is not being a victim, it's called running a lousy campaign. Being judged as Arroyo's candidate is indeed playing the role of a victim. A willing victim. Let no one ever forget too that this man actively sought, competed for and obtained the nomination of Lakas and Arroyo's personal endorsement. He abandoned his uncle's much leaner Nationalist People's Coalition to take advantage of the muscles and stealth of Arroyo's Lakas-Kampi. Now he is stuck with it. In fact, he might have to preside over this party's total disintegration after the elections when the same wicked ways of Philippine politics would make Lakas just another minor political party when its members abandon it to join the new ruling party. Like they did from Marcos' KBL to Cory's PDP-LABAN-UNIDO to Ramos' Lakas-NUCD to Erap's NPC-PMP then back to another incarnation of Lakas-Kampi by Arroyo.
And to say that Teodoro should not be blamed for Arroyo's many sins just does not make political sense. That's what elections are supposed to do. It's supposed to bring back to the people the power to hold those who governed them accountable for how their leaders failed them. Teodoro not only shares the same party with Arroyo, he likewise served Arroyo's government in the very strategic role as Defense Secretary. He did not just play deaf when the hello garci tapes were playing, nor played blind while his colleagues in the cabinet were stealing billions in the fertilizer scam, Teodoro willingly embraced Arroyo and her government.
Why and how some people would even ignore the Arroyo aspect of Teodoro's candidacy is just too much of a spin. There's no way around it. That despite Teodoro's supposed brilliance, he failed to discern the collective impact of 10 years of unbridled greed for power and money in his decision to join her government, much less run as her party's standard bearer.
Teodoro's candidacy in Arroyo's party is no accident. And consequently, neither is his impending catastrophic defeat.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
why this election matters
in this election, the cliche becomes the alarming truth. election after every election in the philippines, talking heads always make it a point to say that this is the most important one in our lifetime. that it would redefine how we live, how we relate to our neighbors and potentially change the fortunes of millions of people for better or for worse.
2010 whether we like it might be our last chance to finally make it on board the latest and strongest wave of Asian economic revolutions. furthermore, the passing of 10 years of uninhibited and shameless greed might have spared the elite and the upper middle class with an economic implosion, but it has left the poor much more destitute than they ever were. something that doesn't mix well with our being part of the region's ascendancy as the new epicenter of world economic power.
this is validated by every survey done by either the Social Weather Station or Pulse Asia where those at the bottom of the food chain consistently describe themselves as much poorer and much hungrier than ever before. the creation of this massive underclass, angry and desperate doesn't bode well for a country trying to recover from a family's greed. it would make it a lot harder for the new president to manage an economy that has been effective divided into two distinct jurisdictions. one for the wealthy and one for the very poor. the new president will also have to grapple with a stunning budget deficit left by this irresponsible arroyo regime as a political measure to keep the economy artificially growing despite the lack of real industrial, commercial or agricultural productivity. all these factors create the perfect condition for a sudden and explosive social upheaval.
like here in the United States where the depth of this dark and nasty recession hasn't been anticipated by anyone long before it happened, the next philippine president faces a poverty problem that has been in evolution for at least 40 years. chronic and deeply insidious, this problem defies unimaginative solutions. villar's sloganeering and pathetic pandering to the poor reminds us of past campaigns that targeted this vulnerable sector as a reliable electoral tool. villar, once dirt poor, has a cute and charming story that inspires the teleserye crowd. but the presidency is more than botox-type image engineering in solving the country's problems. it takes more than a slew of commercials to hide what's behind the glitzy campaign, a dearth of ideas.
and the two leading candidates, while both declared oppositionists to arroyo, have very different backgrounds as they present themselves to the people. villar presents himself as the candidate of the poor on the basis of his having come from that side of the hood. aquino on the other hand, belongs to perhaps the most remarkable if not the most loved family in the country. to say that the aquinos are the philippines' answer to america's kennedys would perhaps be too presumptuous for the kennedys. the political orientation of these two men are quite a departure from each other as well. aquino aligns himself with the socially progressive groups that espouse policy in tune with the left of center. villar on the other hand, while having been successful in wooing some important characters from the Left, can only be described as a centrist, if at all. his past advocacies and policies have too much straddling between social philosophies that it is hard to decipher who villar really is.
well the answer is simple, he's none of these. in his political statements, he never showed any consistency of political and social purpose. his actions were dictated by what the times called for. like impeaching estrada, a supposed ally of his at that time, when public sympathy showed that that was the expedient thing to do. and in every senate investigation when he took its reins, villar clearly read the surveys everyday and conveniently acted accordingly.
now he is pandering to the poor. agitating the poor's sentiments against the government that for almost 20 years he helped craft and form policy. mindful of his billions' power in obtaining the presidency, he gives away houses and lots, tricycles and jeepneys in noontime shows with his poorly botoxed face in an act that can only be described as quintessentially filipino, dole out politics. and he makes no qualms too in declaring that he's using his own money. to say that villar is buying his way into malacanang is an understatement. how he will reap the profits of this massive investment into this campaign for the presidency, only the wisest deity would really know.
of course, aquino is not necessarily a mendicant either. he is the scion of an old and legendary political and economic clan. his existence is the perfect specimen of the marriage between politics and old money. his candidacy brings back pictures of the of the marcos-aquino divide that consumed the nation's energy for decades. questions on his sincerity about social reform appears in the backdrop of his family's feudal character. the hacienda luisita question still begs to be answered.
but despite all these, conrado de quiros' assertion of this election as being between good and evil becomes the title of this election's teleserye. the necessity of picking an honest and competent president whose character is capable of personal sacrifice instead of personal gain cannot be overemphasized. we need a leader who will not sell a part of our soul to our foreign partners as we seek our own place in the emerging world order in the Far East. villar's persistent involvement in his vast empire gives the term conflict of interest a whole new watered down definition. how a leader like him can broker well for our country and allow his businesses to take a back seat as he governs is indeed a very difficult task. villar never parted with his businesses when he was a congressman, speaker, senator, and senate president. and he won't start doing it now.
if villar wins therefore, our country will be mired again by a government that has lost all the trust that it needs to move forward the grand vision of re-building a great country. not when there are investigations left and right and a persistent instability brought about by a restless and suspicious public.
corruption must end. there's got to be a plan out there that would at least aim to drastically curb stealing other people's money. corruption not only weakens our economy, it hinders the country from fully participating in the greatest economic drama since america's surge as the leading economic power of the 20th century. if we let china's ascent scare us more than be inspired by its tremendous leap forward and be on-board the drive towards ultra-modernity, then we would have missed out once again as we did in the 60s and 70s. given the porousness of our nation's borders, goods, services and even human labor will be exchanged at levels never before seen in the world economy. the philippines should benefit immensely from this given our strategic position in the center of the southeast asian basin.
the next president's view (or the lack of it) of all these massive changes will determine who will be able to maximize the benefits of a resurgent chinese economy. it will certainly involve a resurgent japan and south korea, and the rest of southeast asia will be awash with direct investments.
we just can't afford another costly mistake at the polls anymore. it's now or never for the philippines.instead of the security threat that china has always been perceived to be in the philippines, it now presents as a giant opportunity for the philippines and for the region in creating prosperity never before seen in this scale and breadth. choosing which leader to negotiate for us will therefore determine the philippines' rising role in the Asia-Pacific.
now more that ever, our nation's fate is dependent on the economic prosperity of our neigboring China, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan and even Singapore. The continuing decline of the US vis-a-vis the Far East tells us of s rapidly shifting balance of economic power. in 2008, china overtook japan as the world's 2nd largest economy. in 2015, china will do the same with the US.
We would therefore require an outward-looking, honest and competent leader with no conflicting interests as he or she deals with infrastructures, joint ventures and human power exchange programs. in other words, we need an honest advocate in negotiating the terms of our country's future.
of course, he can't be selling his land with malls on the side as the site of his first bullet train project can't he?
2010 whether we like it might be our last chance to finally make it on board the latest and strongest wave of Asian economic revolutions. furthermore, the passing of 10 years of uninhibited and shameless greed might have spared the elite and the upper middle class with an economic implosion, but it has left the poor much more destitute than they ever were. something that doesn't mix well with our being part of the region's ascendancy as the new epicenter of world economic power.
this is validated by every survey done by either the Social Weather Station or Pulse Asia where those at the bottom of the food chain consistently describe themselves as much poorer and much hungrier than ever before. the creation of this massive underclass, angry and desperate doesn't bode well for a country trying to recover from a family's greed. it would make it a lot harder for the new president to manage an economy that has been effective divided into two distinct jurisdictions. one for the wealthy and one for the very poor. the new president will also have to grapple with a stunning budget deficit left by this irresponsible arroyo regime as a political measure to keep the economy artificially growing despite the lack of real industrial, commercial or agricultural productivity. all these factors create the perfect condition for a sudden and explosive social upheaval.
like here in the United States where the depth of this dark and nasty recession hasn't been anticipated by anyone long before it happened, the next philippine president faces a poverty problem that has been in evolution for at least 40 years. chronic and deeply insidious, this problem defies unimaginative solutions. villar's sloganeering and pathetic pandering to the poor reminds us of past campaigns that targeted this vulnerable sector as a reliable electoral tool. villar, once dirt poor, has a cute and charming story that inspires the teleserye crowd. but the presidency is more than botox-type image engineering in solving the country's problems. it takes more than a slew of commercials to hide what's behind the glitzy campaign, a dearth of ideas.
and the two leading candidates, while both declared oppositionists to arroyo, have very different backgrounds as they present themselves to the people. villar presents himself as the candidate of the poor on the basis of his having come from that side of the hood. aquino on the other hand, belongs to perhaps the most remarkable if not the most loved family in the country. to say that the aquinos are the philippines' answer to america's kennedys would perhaps be too presumptuous for the kennedys. the political orientation of these two men are quite a departure from each other as well. aquino aligns himself with the socially progressive groups that espouse policy in tune with the left of center. villar on the other hand, while having been successful in wooing some important characters from the Left, can only be described as a centrist, if at all. his past advocacies and policies have too much straddling between social philosophies that it is hard to decipher who villar really is.
well the answer is simple, he's none of these. in his political statements, he never showed any consistency of political and social purpose. his actions were dictated by what the times called for. like impeaching estrada, a supposed ally of his at that time, when public sympathy showed that that was the expedient thing to do. and in every senate investigation when he took its reins, villar clearly read the surveys everyday and conveniently acted accordingly.
now he is pandering to the poor. agitating the poor's sentiments against the government that for almost 20 years he helped craft and form policy. mindful of his billions' power in obtaining the presidency, he gives away houses and lots, tricycles and jeepneys in noontime shows with his poorly botoxed face in an act that can only be described as quintessentially filipino, dole out politics. and he makes no qualms too in declaring that he's using his own money. to say that villar is buying his way into malacanang is an understatement. how he will reap the profits of this massive investment into this campaign for the presidency, only the wisest deity would really know.
of course, aquino is not necessarily a mendicant either. he is the scion of an old and legendary political and economic clan. his existence is the perfect specimen of the marriage between politics and old money. his candidacy brings back pictures of the of the marcos-aquino divide that consumed the nation's energy for decades. questions on his sincerity about social reform appears in the backdrop of his family's feudal character. the hacienda luisita question still begs to be answered.
but despite all these, conrado de quiros' assertion of this election as being between good and evil becomes the title of this election's teleserye. the necessity of picking an honest and competent president whose character is capable of personal sacrifice instead of personal gain cannot be overemphasized. we need a leader who will not sell a part of our soul to our foreign partners as we seek our own place in the emerging world order in the Far East. villar's persistent involvement in his vast empire gives the term conflict of interest a whole new watered down definition. how a leader like him can broker well for our country and allow his businesses to take a back seat as he governs is indeed a very difficult task. villar never parted with his businesses when he was a congressman, speaker, senator, and senate president. and he won't start doing it now.
if villar wins therefore, our country will be mired again by a government that has lost all the trust that it needs to move forward the grand vision of re-building a great country. not when there are investigations left and right and a persistent instability brought about by a restless and suspicious public.
corruption must end. there's got to be a plan out there that would at least aim to drastically curb stealing other people's money. corruption not only weakens our economy, it hinders the country from fully participating in the greatest economic drama since america's surge as the leading economic power of the 20th century. if we let china's ascent scare us more than be inspired by its tremendous leap forward and be on-board the drive towards ultra-modernity, then we would have missed out once again as we did in the 60s and 70s. given the porousness of our nation's borders, goods, services and even human labor will be exchanged at levels never before seen in the world economy. the philippines should benefit immensely from this given our strategic position in the center of the southeast asian basin.
the next president's view (or the lack of it) of all these massive changes will determine who will be able to maximize the benefits of a resurgent chinese economy. it will certainly involve a resurgent japan and south korea, and the rest of southeast asia will be awash with direct investments.
we just can't afford another costly mistake at the polls anymore. it's now or never for the philippines.instead of the security threat that china has always been perceived to be in the philippines, it now presents as a giant opportunity for the philippines and for the region in creating prosperity never before seen in this scale and breadth. choosing which leader to negotiate for us will therefore determine the philippines' rising role in the Asia-Pacific.
now more that ever, our nation's fate is dependent on the economic prosperity of our neigboring China, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan and even Singapore. The continuing decline of the US vis-a-vis the Far East tells us of s rapidly shifting balance of economic power. in 2008, china overtook japan as the world's 2nd largest economy. in 2015, china will do the same with the US.
We would therefore require an outward-looking, honest and competent leader with no conflicting interests as he or she deals with infrastructures, joint ventures and human power exchange programs. in other words, we need an honest advocate in negotiating the terms of our country's future.
of course, he can't be selling his land with malls on the side as the site of his first bullet train project can't he?
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Going Home
The other day, I spent time contemplating on where I go from here. I've settled pretty nicely in my little private cocoon in southwestern Florida under the distant but watchful eyes of my extended clan. When I boarded that Northwest flight to Newark five years ago, I have determined that it was time to create a new beginning in America. Leaving an excessively happy life in Manila with a social circle not a lot of mortals will be able to maintain wasn't necessarily easy, but the prospects of starting anew sort of negated all those nostalgic feelings of loss.
I got the job that I wanted in a city called Port Charlotte. A lot of people say that my start in the US was quite an easy one, bereft of horror stories of having to wash dishes or having to mop floors that even some my wealthier cousins had to do when they landed here decades ago. Within my first year of employment, I hit the 6-digit mark and never looked back. While I left behind a would-have-been new but flourishing career in Rehab Med, I had no regrets of the career shift I made to Pharmacy. Despite some horrific encounters with uneducated, uneducable, unkempt, severely drugged and rude scumbags as patients, pharmacists are highly regarded by the community. PharmD is almost educationally equivalent to an MD. Aside from the fact that I never had any intention of going back to residency here, I was fine with doing this gig for the long haul.
Determined to become a good American (as I still am), I believed (and still does) that immigrants have a greater burden of proving themselves worthy to share in the bounty of this country. I immersed myself in things that are important to everyone living in here. Consistently mindful of the heavy responsibility of contributing to society, I was always conscious of what I can do to help those in need. Despite the severe recession that hit the US and affected countless numbers of Americans, Fil-Ams included, the resiliency of my profession proved valuable in times of serious challenges.
But as the months turned into years, this same steadiness became my enemy as I battled the urge to go home to the Philippines. Pinoy TV was partly to blame for this slow slide into favoring a return home. My annual trips to the motherland always reconnected me with the family and friends that I left behind. But the sensation of always being home through TV everyday made me engaged with everything that was going on across the Pacific. Of course I'm exaggerating Pinoy TV's role in my life There are other big factors too. The apparent end of the Arroyo regime is a huge come-on for me since it was one of the primary reasons for my leaving in the first place. The thought of a post-Arroyo era excites me as this could open a lot of possibilities. And I must admit, I really miss the life I left behind. I miss the privileges of home. I miss the many people that surrounded me everyday in both Manila and in my home province. I miss traffic congestion too, America's freeways are way too convenient for me. I miss my friends. I miss the power that came with my uniform and my title. I know it's partly vanity, but I really want my old life back.
This going home is not set in stone though. I still haven't set the date, nor the year for that matter. All I know is that I'm no longer going to be here until and even beyond retirement. I have started to lay the ground work for this however. While this move is not by any means unstoppable, most of my present investment and career direction are all being geared towards this goal.
I guess this is a part of my destiny. Since I was a child, I have always been taught the deep sense of duty towards my country. I do not for one second regret my having left the country as this even made me value my being Filipino. Even the bad aspects of being one. I know that I will still come home to an imperfect place, one plagued by an ever worsening poverty problem, among a lot of other things. I also know that I will come home to a Philippines that had become 2 countries, one for the wealthy and one for the poor.
But these are also the reasons why I am going home. Staying In America, despite donations for causes in the Philippines, would really not mean much in effecting change. No matter how insignificant my contribution may be, I want to participate in building the country that we all want. The renewed hope with the ending of this brutal and greedy regime ushers in aspirations for a greater nation. The coming of the Pacific age with the ascendancy of China should be seized as an opportunity, not a threat. This is our new call as a nation, this just might be our time.
I have always said my piece from afar. It's now time to put my money where my mouth is. At home.
I got the job that I wanted in a city called Port Charlotte. A lot of people say that my start in the US was quite an easy one, bereft of horror stories of having to wash dishes or having to mop floors that even some my wealthier cousins had to do when they landed here decades ago. Within my first year of employment, I hit the 6-digit mark and never looked back. While I left behind a would-have-been new but flourishing career in Rehab Med, I had no regrets of the career shift I made to Pharmacy. Despite some horrific encounters with uneducated, uneducable, unkempt, severely drugged and rude scumbags as patients, pharmacists are highly regarded by the community. PharmD is almost educationally equivalent to an MD. Aside from the fact that I never had any intention of going back to residency here, I was fine with doing this gig for the long haul.
Determined to become a good American (as I still am), I believed (and still does) that immigrants have a greater burden of proving themselves worthy to share in the bounty of this country. I immersed myself in things that are important to everyone living in here. Consistently mindful of the heavy responsibility of contributing to society, I was always conscious of what I can do to help those in need. Despite the severe recession that hit the US and affected countless numbers of Americans, Fil-Ams included, the resiliency of my profession proved valuable in times of serious challenges.
But as the months turned into years, this same steadiness became my enemy as I battled the urge to go home to the Philippines. Pinoy TV was partly to blame for this slow slide into favoring a return home. My annual trips to the motherland always reconnected me with the family and friends that I left behind. But the sensation of always being home through TV everyday made me engaged with everything that was going on across the Pacific. Of course I'm exaggerating Pinoy TV's role in my life There are other big factors too. The apparent end of the Arroyo regime is a huge come-on for me since it was one of the primary reasons for my leaving in the first place. The thought of a post-Arroyo era excites me as this could open a lot of possibilities. And I must admit, I really miss the life I left behind. I miss the privileges of home. I miss the many people that surrounded me everyday in both Manila and in my home province. I miss traffic congestion too, America's freeways are way too convenient for me. I miss my friends. I miss the power that came with my uniform and my title. I know it's partly vanity, but I really want my old life back.
This going home is not set in stone though. I still haven't set the date, nor the year for that matter. All I know is that I'm no longer going to be here until and even beyond retirement. I have started to lay the ground work for this however. While this move is not by any means unstoppable, most of my present investment and career direction are all being geared towards this goal.
I guess this is a part of my destiny. Since I was a child, I have always been taught the deep sense of duty towards my country. I do not for one second regret my having left the country as this even made me value my being Filipino. Even the bad aspects of being one. I know that I will still come home to an imperfect place, one plagued by an ever worsening poverty problem, among a lot of other things. I also know that I will come home to a Philippines that had become 2 countries, one for the wealthy and one for the poor.
But these are also the reasons why I am going home. Staying In America, despite donations for causes in the Philippines, would really not mean much in effecting change. No matter how insignificant my contribution may be, I want to participate in building the country that we all want. The renewed hope with the ending of this brutal and greedy regime ushers in aspirations for a greater nation. The coming of the Pacific age with the ascendancy of China should be seized as an opportunity, not a threat. This is our new call as a nation, this just might be our time.
I have always said my piece from afar. It's now time to put my money where my mouth is. At home.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)